Thursday, August 12, 2010

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Advantages Of Being A Woman

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. Free drinks, free dinners, free movies ... (you get the point).

5. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

6. Taxis stop for us.

7. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

8. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if we're gay.

12. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

13. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

16. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

17. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

18. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

19. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

20. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

Scared to Death

Poor turtle got scared.